Fifty Shades, Part 1.

*MAY HAVE SPOILERS*

Now, I've just finished reading 50 Shades of Grey, Part 1. Yes it did take me a long time but being the multi-tasker that I am, I was juggling Firestarter, Carrie and Fifty Shades at the same time.

My initial thoughts were that I wouldn't like it; I don't like BDSM and I don't like cocky blokes in suits and it's hard to use Facebook without hearing that FS has both of those things in it.

But, after reading through the first few chapters, you come to realise that it isn't just a girl-porn, it's a story of a blossoming romance with a man that has serious control issues. I haven't read the 2nd or 3rd yet but I'm guessing it has something to do with his mother. All men's problems are because of their mothers. Somehow, some way, it always comes back to them. It's why I want a girl when I pop one out.

But I digress. Despite Christian Grey having a very serious, business-like exterior, he also has a very soft, sweet side that he doesn't like showing. Cliché I know, but in this story, it works well. Now, as Anastasia finds out very slowly, he has never had a real girlfriend before or ever had real feelings towards a woman before her. All he's ever had are 'subs' meaning submissives, a BDSM term for someone that you control and does everything you say.

Part of the story is Ana trying to learn the submissive ways so she can please him in the sack and struggling with it. Since she's pig-headed like me, part of why the story is so relate-able to me. And the other part is Christian trying to compromise with her - because he has very strong feelings for the first time in his life - and become more boyfriend-y and struggling with that. But, they both try very hard.

The problem comes from the fact that, because of some childhood trauma, I guess, Christian does not like being touched. He doesn't like sleeping in the same bed as a woman and he doesn't know how to express his feelings towards her well. Ana tries to delve deep into his mind and find out where his touch phobia comes from but she is unsuccessful. I think that part of the reason she tries so hard to be his submissive is because she hopes that sooner or later he'll confide in her. That doesn't happen during Part one unfortunately.

Now, I found the journey of Christian trying to be a 'normal' guy very sweet and addictive. It's a joy to read all the small things he does for her; things he's never done before and the parts of his life he opens up to her. It's the main part of the reason why I enjoyed it so much. The thought that a woman can change a man to be more suitable to her, is a secret want to many women in the world. But, it doesn't come without problems.

Towards the end of the book, Ana makes her feelings for him very clear and although he feels the same - it's very obvious at this point - he is shocked and slightly appalled that someone could feel that way towards him. He has very bad confidence issues in himself, despite being filthy rich and hot as hell. This again, is most likely because of past family issues and the horrible childhood that he had.

The end of the book is very upsetting, I won't tell you what happens but it's a shock. Even though you will probably think, like I did, that it was inevitable.

The journey of two people, who are extremely different, trying to find a happy way to be together is really well written in this book and you do really start to care for them and hope they can find a way to do it. I look forward to reading Part 2 and 3 in the coming days.