Thursday 25 January 2018

Well, I'm back again.

It's been a long time since I posted last; mostly because I've had a child, moved twice, got married, and put nearly a stone of weight on from eating pizza. But I'm here!

This isn't going to be a big post, just wanted to let everyone know my boring old life is back online.

I'm currently sat upstairs on my dusty PC while my daughter plays on what used to be my Note tablet and we're watching The Secret Life of Pets for the 100th time this month. Not that I'm complaining; of all the films to choose this is probably one of the best. It's also made me kinda want a cat. *shrug*

Everyone is doing well in the Preskey House. We got married in June and we've moved back to my hometown so we're finally living mould free! Bear is doing great, she's happy now the kid is in the nursery and we can have some time to go running together.

Lara is thriving. She started walking at 9 months and saying sentences not long after that so it's pretty much her house now. We just sort of walk around on eggshells and try not to set off the 'toddler tantrum', which does not describe the episode in enough horror. Toddler tantrums are in fact better known as 'bitch fits'. Or Armageddon. Here's an example: this morning I asked her if she wanted chocolate spread on toast with blueberries, she said no. So I started to prepare her usual cereal and you know what she did? Screamed the place down. Why? Because she wanted chocolate spread on toast with blueberries. This is just a tiny example of why Ben and I drink whisky now. There's no other way to handle these outbursts other than heroin and we don't want to go down that route. I like teeth.

It's funny with her because she can go from the Devil to an angel in the space of five seconds. She punched me this morning for trying to brush her teeth and then a few seconds later, hugged me and told me she loved me 'the best'. Toddlers are bat-shit crazy. They're basically Negan.

Anyway, there's a dude downstairs putting us some flooring down (carpets and toddlers don't mix!) so I'll try to get back soon with some more terrible life lessons!

NX


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